I did not realise how quickly my naked self could move until I dropped my Kindle in the bath at the start of the Christmas holidays. Frantically scooping it out, I gently swaddled her in a small towel and shouted, ''Get me some rice NOW!'' I can be quite assertive and in control when required. Shrouding myself in a larger towel before carefully laying my beloved companion into a casserole dish and burying her in dry rice, I muse.Please don't die yet, you bring me so much joy.
Thankfully, the towel, the rice, the plea have worked.
The first dilemma of the holidays arose with a difficult decision to make. As usual, our social events clashed; shall we attend a carol service or go camping? ''I have a bad feeling about this.'' Surprisingly, Romeo steers us all onto another course declaring that we were going to see Star Wars: The Force Awakens. Brilliant! This will be the first time in two years that I have been to the big screen. I wasn't disappointed; gasping in delight at the IMAX screen, travelling at lightspeed through the galaxy with my 3D specs on, absorbing the adventure and relationships. It was almost like being in church. We sat in a row together, listening as the stories unfolded and made some sense. The original Star Wars films are pure allegory aren't they, George?
So with the Kindle re-fired and the Force awakened I felt empowered to take Dirtbag for her 8.00am Christmas Eve dental appointment. Brace yourself Ellie! Another opportunity to try out my limited Spanish on the Cuban orthodontist.
''¿Buenos días cómo estás. Feliz Navidad.'' I'm trusting google translate has got it right here.
We enjoyed the freedom to celebrate in our community by singing some carols, feasting on fine food and frolicking later on in the evening. Bruce the dog was lapping up all the fuss and attention in his cute little Santa jacket.
Christmas day appeared gloomy and overcast. Perfect, just like England. I cycled down to the beach for my swim in the large waves. Another brave soul was already body boarding. The sea didn't feel too cold at all and I was soon splashing around whilst trying to keep the silver tinsel in my hair. Then the heavy rains came, pounding down all day long, creating huge puddles and preempting the terrible floods in the UK on Boxing Day. My in-laws live next to the River Irwell which flooded their garden, cellar and garage. It was sad to see it on the news as it is only 400 yards or so away from The Waterside, a pub we frequented which collapsed into the river. Nearer to home, York, Manchester, Leeds, Brighouse and Elland seemed to be sinking. I trust they will resurface and return to normal soon.
We revisit the cinema, this time, to see Spectre. Brilliant! Mini-Me is a keen Bond fan. I had to exercise the art of self-control as I was sitting next to a white thobed man and one of his wives, I presume. When The Writing's on the Wall resounded during the opening sequence I mimed the lyrics perfectly but really I wanted to sing them out at the top of my voice. It was so hard to restrain myself. It would have been much better all round if they had used Radiohead's sublime ''Spectre'' theme instead. After my initial torture, I settled down to focus on the plot. My heartbeat became erratic engaging in all the adrenaline-surging action and also in anticipation of some sex scenes. It soon regulated itself when I realised the really exciting bits were all completely cut! How frustrating for a midlife crisis comme moi. It's a good job I have a great imagination isn't it? Our kids can keep singing their songs of innocence for a while longer. OO7's drill torture scene transported me back to Dirtbag's dental appointment. Ouch! I'm sure it's harder to watch than experience.
''How do I live?
How do I breathe?
When you're not here I'm suffocating.''
Sam Smith, take my advice and buy some Olbas Oil (cf. Distracted by decongestant 14/1/15).
Wonderfully, Mini-Me finds himself wearing a brand new, white PSG football kit and standing in the tunnel waiting to walk out onto the pitch with Inter Milan player number 33, Danilo D'Ambrossio.
''Mum, I said Hi to Mancini and he said Hi back!''
''Who is Mancini?'' I replied.
''MUM!''
I enjoyed sitting in the dazzling Millennium Falcon Al Sadd Stadium with its Spider camera zipping up and down. The WOOHOO from Blur's Song 2 blasted out when the only goal of the friendly match was scored by PSG. On my way to the toilet, I found a folded QR 50 note. Hmmm, another dilemma? Picking it up I thrust it into the hand of one of the yellow T.shirt wearing Spectator Services men and get a beaming smile in return. It's only when I embark on my subsequent bathroom trip that I notice the shiny Rolex resting comfortably on his wrist. The sad looking cleaner in the toilet block should have received my bounty.
We welcomed in the New Year with good friends, hosting the party at our house. Well, the lights were still in place from the birthday party so it was no trouble. Mum had sweetly sent me a message at midnight, 9 pm UK time. After everyone had left or gone to sleep, I stayed up until 3 am with a cup of tea and some Pringles. Looking up into the night sky I silently wished my family and friends from miles away a very happy year ahead.
My Blackberry has crumbled so I now possess Dirtbag's old iPhone 4s complete with its cracked back. Beware it may take me a while to navigate this new piece of technology and reconnect on What'sApp again. Do I have to glue it onto my palm straightaway?
Gazing somewhat enviously up at Orion I am amazed that his belt is not one notch looser after this festive season. He is most certainly a lucky constellation. On a cool, starry evening stroll with Romeo, I am treated to the biggest, brightest shooting star that I have ever seen in my entire life. It was so amazing and seemed to glow across the sky in slow motion just for me and my wishful thinking. If I tell you all my wishes I will have to mind-wipe you and that could hurt. So I won't.
Reading: Brixton Beach by Roma Tearne
Listening to: Music Complete, New Order's new album
Singing: Tutti Frutti by New Order
Editing: My novel. It is in four parts, including a prologue and epilogue.
I'm currently editing Part 4.
Keep on dancing and adventuring with me. Click on the link below. xx
www.youtube.com/watch?v=QtXby3twMmI
Songs of Innocence and Experience by William Blake
No comments:
Post a Comment