Blurred Vision

 

Another trip to Specsavers and this time I find myself coming out with my first ever prescription for some reading glasses. My eyes are also tested for glaucoma as Mum has it and I'm happy to report the optometrist assessed that my pressure was good. That's reassuring, unlike my blood pressure which was sky high when I used my own monitor recently. Was that because I had just had my first wild swim in a local reservoir in April? What hypertension? It was flipping freezing. I will possibly write more of that adventure another time when I have thawed out fully.

Back to the eyes for now. Let's see if we can create a clearer picture for you readers. Blimey, this font size is just as small as the bottom line of the close range reading test I could not decipher at all. I was quite horrified as Dad didn't need his first pair of reading glasses until he was 50. That was also my goal. My mission has failed with 7 months still to go to reach that half-century milestone. Fear not, I have already purchased a new party frock to redress the balance.

Clark Kent (to protect his true identity), was given the challenge of helping me choose my first glasses, poor lad. I was feeling quite giddy by this stage because I realised it signalled yet another sign of ageing that I have to fully embrace. I am desperately trying to transition smoothly and gracefully into this next stage of my life.

Glancing wildly around the store, I saw a poster with a lovely auburn haired female modelling some perfect frames and blurted out, 'I want to look like her!' Clark was probably grimacing behind his mask whilst thinking, fat chance of that you daft woman. He chose instead to remain professionally focused and politely laughed along with me. Regaining composure, I changed tack by suggesting that I wanted to look intelligent instead.

Due to stricter hygiene requirements, every time I tried on some frames I had to put them in a special tray for a super duper deep cleaning process, so I felt a bit guilty trying on lots of them. This further increased the challenge before me. 

It was also going to be very hard to choose my first pair of glasses because I had cycled in, (to defeat the signs of ageing), and therefore my hair was a mess and, of course, I had to wear a face mask. Lovely young auburn haired, perfectly framed goddess looked nothing like me. Was she actually smirking down on me with her effervescent youth and beauty? Watch out, your time will come perfect poster model.

The designer range was my first real hurdle to get over without upsetting young Mr Kent, who was wearing a very nice pair of glasses by the way. Were they real or just for show? I genuinely believe other people really suit glasses, tattoos, grey hair and laughter lines.

Romeo wears contact lenses and glasses but usually not at the same time. Both have great advantages for me because when he is lens free he still thinks I look lovely even at close range. This is brilliant news because we all know how often looks can be deceiving.

'How about these Karen Millen ones?' Clark proffers them forth.

'Agh! NO WAY man, I cannot do designer, it's just not me. Haven't you heard Suzanne by Leonard Cohen. I am the very same charity shop rags and feathers wearing woman.'

'And you want travel with her, and you want to travel blind 

And then you know you can trust her

For she's touched your perfect body with her mind....'

Undeterred he thrusts a pair of Kylie frames towards me with silver encrusted arms.

'NO WAY!! I love Kylie, everyone loves Kylie, but I really can't see myself in them.'

He's finally getting the picture. 'No bling then.' 

Definitely no bling.

We jump down a couple of price brackets to the shop's own range. This is more like it. Why didn't we start here in the first place, I wonder?

'The trouble is Clark, there are so many to choose from. I mean, if there were only two choices it would be very easy wouldn't it?' I can sense him longing for his lunch break which is another galaxy away as it has only just gone 10 am. To help us both, I suddenly whip out my oversized sunglasses from the dazzling yellow cycling jacket I'm highly visible in.

'These are my sunglasses, but I don't want anything quite so big for reading with do I?'

This kickstarts a whole new phase where I can discern progression. Superman hands me some dark tortoiseshell frames which are OK, then another lighter pair. Like the blind leading the blind we are slowly getting somewhere. Finally, I settle on some pale tan coloured, faintly tortoiseshell frames which don't look too bad, I suppose. I'm sure I will be able to fashion my intelligent reading look in time. And really, despite all things vainly appearance related, I do want to be able to read comfortably for the rest of my life. There is so much more to learn, absorb, to be inspired by, and so little time for it all.

All of us must continue to make time for the simple pleasures in life.

Do not underestimate those things which make you happy and feel at peace. Strive for balance in work, rest, exercise and relaxation and try to enjoy all things in equal measure. This is my enlightened vision for my own future health and happiness. 

To fifty and beyond................................Suzz Lightyear to the rescue (of herself).

With love xx

PS If you're struggling to read this blog post please get your precious eyes checked, or simply alter your font size to LARGEST.