Monday 29 February 2016

Footnotes, friends and the fury

A footnote for the previous post

I did check all plural forms of the penis for any of you clever dicks out there thinking that I may have made a cock up.

Can you feel the force?

Sometimes the facebook force is so strong and it draws me into Romeo's secret world. I flick through his news feed watching it scroll up like end film credits, seeing many names I don't know. When I glimpse the ones I do know, I pause and smile, giving them the credit they deserve. The problem with facebook for me is that it is not enough. If I see you in a photo I want to be right there with you and I miss you more. Is that what the force is? How many friends can we cope with, surely 300 is far too many Romeo? Although most of you read me via facebook so I am eternally grateful for this connection. Still resisting the urge to create my own account I think about the diverse and wonderful collection of my lovely friends. They know who they are.
I am tentatively considering creating a page as a writer to tap into this digital age of publishing.

'A friend is a loved one who awakens your life in order to free the wild possibilities within you.'

From anam cara by John O' Donohue.

Just to let all my home county friends and family know I have signed the online Government petition to prevent the closure of Huddersfield A&E department.


Making Chocolate with Mini-Me

Josh: We have to make some chocolate for homework.

Susie: Great! (she is secretly dreading this chaos).

The Sue chef lets the mini one take control. Bewilderingly they have all the ingredients in the pantry already. He weighs, measures, mixes, pours and spills. She has fun and stirs the melted mass on the stove becoming Vianne Rocher in Chocolat. Did you know that Joanne Harris is from Yorkshire too?

Susie: Très bon Joshua, il est fantastique! I know your favourite chocolate, blanc oui, comme Papa?

This homework gets 10/10, a zillion house points and a gigantic green tick from me.
Merci Professeur de Mini-Me!

Mini-Me in his chocolate factory


Yet Another Kitchen Drama

Why do we always end up in the kitchen? The stage lights are of course brightly lit and blinding.

Enter Dirtbag and the action.

We have a heated discussion about both something and nothing at the same time. It's like speaking an alien language and it always takes me down a dark tunnel like Alice on her way to Wonderland, except this is real. I can't for the life of me recall any of the bizarre back and forth dialogue. I probably erased my memory shortly afterwards.
To emphasise one of her points, Ellie forcefully yanks the fridge door open causing the glass jar, containing my homemade salad dressing, to jump off its shelf in shock and smash onto the tiles below. It looks like sick and she unintentionally smears it further afield with a sweeping brush when I shriek at her to clear it up. The microwave referee beeps and in my distress I spill some of my piping hot homemade soup on the work surface and floor.

We are drowning in food stains and screams.

I banish her from my sight and find some solace in singing Talk Show Host by Radiohead at full volume.

I still love her with my whole heart and soul, acknowledging what a despicable dirtbag I was myself at the tender age of fourteen.

Desperate to see Zoolander 2 soon. In the meantime, I will waltz merrily along.
Hope you can join me I'm driving.

With Love xx

www.youtube.com/watch?v=QZTCt-nQY9U

Chocolat - a brilliant book by Joanne Harris and also a great film (2000). Something for you to read/watch during this season of Lent?

A proper footnote

The first footnote is of course technically wrong as it appears at the top of my page but I just had to get it off my chest.

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